Grim Deed Part 5

Back in the Mansion of Umbergloom...

The adventuring party, after many trials, find themselves facing against their next adversary: frustration and annoyance. The adventuring party is also facing a lady in masque; now having dealt the playing cards and distributed the chips across the red felt, she proceeded to sip from her fine. A finger ran across the back of her hidden hole card, right in front of stack of plain white and red chips.

As the adventures question this Lady Blythe, she tilts her head. "Now darlings, what would you like to know?"

"I got a question!" Skyler pushes to the front of the gathering of people, his expression as friendly and thoughtless as ever as he considers this Lady Blythe. "Is Quintin Graves fucking that golem Maximillian? And what's so special about this dump that everyone is defending the deed so thoroughly?" He pauses, and adds, "Plus, your servants suck, lady. They keep getting in our way and are just the *worst*."

Culix sighs and settles into a seat since it seems like things aren't moving along in a hurry, "So many things. I think we've pretty much figured out by now that all the staff here are puppets or constructs or golems or /something/ and I do wonder why, but don't care that much." she says. She eyeballs Sky for a moment, "She's a guest too, right? Least she says she is. They're not her servants." she looks back towards the masked lady. "I guess the main thing I want to know is what's with all this cloak and dagger bullshit? Is there any real reason for it, or is it all just some kind of elaborate joke. Because I gotta say, it's a bit high brow for me."

"She's is a guest," Carver reminds Skyler and agrees with Culix. "So, not her's." She does not criticize his question. Sometimes you have to let the dancer dance, sometimes you have to let a Skyler skyler. "It all does seem a bit much. I know some places's customs seem like elaborate pranks to those not familiar but you at least seem to understand them well enough to play by rules of this place. We, on the other hand, were not informed of any such thing."

"Golem?" The sky pirate's outburst seems to have actually caught Lady Blythe by surprise, and her mouth hangs open for a second. Then she laughs, heartily, before waving him off. "Ah, the good Lord is simply a bodyguard." She smiles sweetly at the overly excited man, and then gestures towards the others. "But let us move on from that... dry personality." No love there, apparently.

The woman taps at the felt whilst looking at Carver. "Your action, sweetie." Her attention then moves towards Culix. "As I said, Quintin is a very careful man. And..." She gestures at Skyler, offering the man another of those smiles. "He does have his suitors, most of them armed with blades; fire, and perhaps with outright murder."

She takes another sip from her wine, "It sounds from your aggravation that he has neglected to tell you all the details, as he so, so very often does. Poor children." She leans back onto her chair. Her red rouge lipstick glistened from the red wine. "As for this place and its 'customs', my darling, perhaps you would care to be little more specific?"

Culix sighs, "Right, we're going to keep doing this whole, we ask you a question, you say some words that aren't actually an answer, then invite us to ask more questions thing, then?" she says then, "Alright, honestly, I don't give a fuck what Quentin's deal is, what this place's deal is, what your deal is. Do you know a way to get into the sewer other than the grate in the kitchen? The mimic went there, I'm pretty sure it has the deed, and I want to go stab it and take it."

"Oh, wow! That's a *lot* of words that say absolutely nothing." Skyler points out with a slow, impressed nod, turning to the others, "She must be nobility."

Turning back to Blythe, he adds, "And I'm not surprised. I kinda want to murder the dude and we only met once and he's paying me." He then nods to Culix, and suggests, "Maybe we ignore the creepy lady in the mask and search the room?"

Carver looks down at her chips, before placing a blind bet. She then reaches for her cards, and what becomes quickly apparent, the ranger isn't very good at playing poker. Worst poker face in the world. "At this point, I'm jus' more invested in understandin' why yous all so weird than completing the job. An' to start, you're wearing a mask too. It's not like that's common. An' it's something you and Mr. Graves both did. That the servants do too, come to thinks of't."

GAME: Carver rolls bluff: (18)+0: 18

GAME: Aelwyn rolls 20: (8)+20: 28

"Oh, the mask is for the ambience." Lady Blythe says, and then gestures. "And the makeup, oh how long it does take to dry. And yes dear, the Lady does not stand for nothing." Lady Blythe then casually throws hefty chunk of chips into the middle. "Oh, the deed was in a mimic?" She tilts her head. "Interesting." Her smile widens a touch. "I would have never thought to look in one."

Meanwhile, she reaches for the deck of cards, in preparation to deal the next. "The sewers?" Her smile widens even further, exposing her pearly white teeth; though a bit wine stained. "Yes, you can enter through the garden, or perhaps the butler upstairs knows the secret staircase to the basement." Then she gives a pouting expression. "But why would you wish to so brutishly assault the poor creature? Surely there is another way to get the deed?"

<OOC> Skyler says, "Can I sense motive?"

<OOC> Aelwyn says, "Sure!"

GAME: Skyler rolls Sense Motive: (9)+11: 20

Skyler squints at Blythe, considering her before shaking his head. "Listen, lady, I know that mimic has a long tongue and it gets lonely in the basement, but you're being a little too helpful for it to be helpful."

Beat.

"That made more sense in my head." He complains to no one, shaking his head. To Culix, he says, "So obviously she doesn't want us to kill that damn mimic, so we need to kill the mimic." He glances around, "But then again, she might know we know she's being dishonest, so she might be honest because she knows we know she knows, y'know?"

Culix shrugs her shoulders, "Stabbing is what I'm good at." she says simply and then looks over towards the hand as it progresses, pondering. "He did mention shovels." she says, remiding the others. "And gave us that key for the shed." she says and looks to Sky. "We could go take a look for ourselves." she suggests. "The staff don't seem to get violent, so we can probably just ignore them and head out to the gardens, start digging."

Carver smirks, as Skyler wraps himself into a logic quandary. It's Knights and Knaves but with assholes and statues. She looks down with a wrinkled nose as her partner follow through their investigative train of thought, as she struggles with how to win the pointless game of cards. She matches the bet, not questioning what the value of the chips are cause... well, she doesn't think she's playing for her soul at the moment. "How would you catch the mimic?"

Lady Blythe holds her wine glass by the rim and sways it lightly in the air, smiling at Skyler. "And what did you say about not knowing the customs of this place, handsome? Naturally I have my own interests." The next set of cards are laid out, and she gives a brief look. Her hand then softly touches the felt to indicate her passing. "Do give my greetings to the gardener; it must be awfully cold out there in this horrible storm."

The question on the mimic makes Lady Blythe turn her head, and she tuts. "It must have gotten horrendously _bored_ if you already found it. Play with it a little, and surely it will forget and drop the deed." She smiles, and leans over to touch Carver's hand. "Just like we are, darling." Her fingers are quite cold.

<OOC> Carver says, "Can I use knowledge to look for any obvious signs she might actually be undead though?"

<OOC> Aelwyn tap chin. "I guess that would be k/religion?"

<OOC> Carver nods, can do that.

GAME: Carver rolls knowledge/religion +6+6: (16)+12+6+6: 40

<OOC> Aelwyn slow blink

<OOC> Aelwyn says, "that a large number"

<OOC> Carver says, "I have pretty good knowledge religion when it comes to monsters!"

"I didn't say anything about customs! I asked if Quintin was fucking Max, and then mentioned you trying to talk circles around us." Skyler protests, adding, "Joke's on you, I'm too dumb to be confused like that!" And he gives her a thumbs up.

To Culix, he replies, "Maybe we can hit the mimic with the shovels if we find it." He pauses, and adds, "And the water isn't an issue. My nanny use to tell me sugar melts but shit floats, so I'll be fine."

"Mchachke," Carver spits. Her hand is pulled back sharply. Her cards spill onto the table, it was a good hand. Shame. Her easy-going, actually rather cordial talk with the strange lady is suddenly much less so. Fingertips brush across the red feathers of her arrows. "Bloodsucker."

A breath away from violence.

<OOC> Culix says, "I'd like to attempt to break a sharp bit of wood off my chair."

<OOC> Aelwyn says, "Go for it! It will take you a bit of effort since it is solid piece of wood, though, so probably not the most subtle thing."

<OOC> Aelwyn says, "Also mood music. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IcmYZL6LWBI ._."

At Carver's words, Culix is on her feet in a flash. The chair is kicked backwards so it tips over, and then she stomps on one of the legs to snap it off, snatching it up in her knife hand. "Vampire?" she asks for confirmation, already brandishing the improvised stake towards Blythe. "Met one of your kind before. Showed him I have teeth too." she says then, and there's a dangerous glint in her eyes. Puppets? No need to smash them if she doesn't need to. Vampires, though? Well that's just a civic duty.

Skyler slowly makes his way around to the opposite side of Blythe than Culix, adding loudly, "I mean, are we surprised? It couldn't be more obvious unless she was sucking on someone's neck." Skyler says inanely, "I usually assume masked women with lopsided tits and attitude problems are evil. Especially when they live in basements." He pauses his attempt to create a flanking opportunity for Culix, squinting. "I mean, vampire or someone's whore, but either way, she sucks, amirite?"

The hand is pulled away, and Lady Blythe takes a deep swig off her wine glass. "How uncouth," She chides, "And basements, really? I do have taste for class, oiled muscle for brains." She rolls her eyes enough to make her neck crick, lets out a sigh, stands. Wobbles. The chair protests. "Then darlings, do not let this mansion swallow you. It would be _unfortunate_."

She snaps her fingers and for a moment nothing seems to happen - except her features start to spread, loosely thrifting away into a foggy cloud. A foggy cloud that slowly begins to retreat towards the far end of the room.

<OOC> Aelwyn nod nod!

<OOC> Skyler says, "Can I throw alchemist fire on her?"

<OOC> Skyler says, "Splatter damage!"

<OOC> Aelwyn says, "You can, but she's totally gas. ._."

<OOC> Skyler says, "Can't do it before she turns?"

<OOC> Aelwyn rub chin. "Roll init?"

GAME: Skyler rolls 1d20+4+2: (19)+4+2: 25

<OOC> Aelwyn says, "+breakdown init to see the modifier"

<OOC> Skyler says, "4 for dex, 2 for swashy init"

<OOC> Culix says, "I don't think gaseous form is technically incorporeal, just becomes very resistant to attacks."

Reithak had been listening carefully for some time now as everyone was speaking and playing cards. At the very least, the person vanishing in to mist snapped them out of their stupor. "Vampires? Shit, explains a whole lot bout why this place is so weird." Reithak grumbled, hopping back to her feet from the table. "What's the plan?"

GAME: Skyler rolls ranged: (16)+10: 26

<OOC> Aelwyn says, "Hits!"

GAME: Skyler used a Alchemist's Fire.

GAME: Skyler rolls 1d6: (6): 6

<OOC> Aelwyn says, "Her clothes are on fire and she is not happy about it."

"No you do *not*!" Skyler snaps as the Lady Blythe begins to distort and transform. Quick as a snake, his hand darts into his jacket, pulls a vial, and *throws* it at her.

Said vial? A collection of volatile liquids known as alchemical fire. "God I *hate* this place! SIT DOWN! STAY!" That last, obviously, directed at Blythe as Skyler begins to fumble for his sword. Just in case.

<OOC> Aelwyn says, "Nobody give a dog to Skyler. ._.,"

<OOC> Carver says, "Notice we're not in timestop, so assume they're trying to flee?"

<OOC> Skyler says, "Hey, if the dog is as mouthy as this bitch..."

<OOC> Culix says, "I'll AoO with my improvised stake. I have catch-off-guard so take no penalty for using an improvised weapon."

GAME: Culix rolls finesse: (2)+10: 12

<OOC> Culix says, "I assume that misses, though."

<OOC> Aelwyn nods. ._.

"Mchachke," Carver's tone is icy. The accent is gone. "I see you. I denounce you. I hunt you." Both eyes are wide and open, following the subtle, insubstantial shape of woman-creature backlit by Skyler's fire. "From this world, I deny you."

"Run little deer. You are not the predator here."

"Craven leech!" Culix hisses as the woman turns to gas and starts to flee. She lashes out with her improvised stake, but she fails to land the strike and tuts in frustration at herself. "Carver can you track her?" she asks. "Open bounty on vamps last I checked." she says and then draws her enchanted dagger in her other hand, holding it at the ready.

Carver blinks, rubbing at her temple. She pulls on her gloves, still wringing her hands as if she can get rid of the vampire's touch with just the anxious little gestures. "...Maybe. It sai' it was a guest, so, its coffin must be in the house or nearby. Some of the help, they mus' be some of her's or loyal to it and invited them in. Ithe job description has changed, yous in agreement?"

"We could always follow the dribbles of alchemical fire." Skyler offers helpfully, as he bounces his sword on the blunt edge on his shoulder, cocking his head, "Ooor... We could call this a loss and just burn the fucking house down."

He spreads his free hand, adding, "We didn't sign a contract with the Adventurer's Guild. We signed it directly with the Golem-fucker. And he didn't mention mimics, vampires, or uppity servants so I'm not exactly worried about him being mad."

Reithak, to their feet while others are striking and burning and trying very hard to hit their foe, holds up one hand. "Easy, I know what you're saying, but, best not to get ahead of ourselves, even if the person who put us here mentioned nothing of vampires." *The egalrin grumbles. "Let's just collect ourselves, and decide on a course of action, now."

Lady Blythe, now known as Mchachke, Bloodsucker, the Craven Leech, the Common Whore, quickly flies off into the ceiling. One could vaguely see in the dark mist a face and a hand holding up a finger. Then they are gone.

A haunting silence returns into the Lounge. Some clattering can be heard from the direction of the lounge - endless servants cleaning up the ignored tea and biscuits.

Meanwhile, back in Tenebrae... "Why do I feel as if there was this strange hostility aimed at me today?" Quintin Graves wonders.

Culix nods her head, "Like I say, deed or no, I reckon we get paid if we slay a vamp." she says. "If we find the deed too, we can shove it up quintin's arse when we find him." she adds a moment later. A glance at Sky, "Also an option. But the guild get uppity when we burn all the proof. There's paperwork." she warns. She tucks the stake away to keep ahold of it for later. "I'll take a look around this room. There was one secret entrance, there might be more. I say you keep an eye out for tracks that vampire left, and we follow them. If that turns up nothing, we go to the garden and get some shovels. Sound like a plan?"

Skyler pauses, and then squints up at the ceiling. "I think she might be upset at us." Skyler says solemnly, before sheathing his sword on his back and brushing his hands off, "Well, that was my last vial of alchemist fire, so if we're going to burn the place down we gotta do it the old fashion way."